Shut Up And Listen 236

Well, the new TV season has begun again and I've managed to watch a healthy mix of returning and new shows. There's some good, some bad, and a lot of crap in between that works best if you just shut your brain down and watch blankly. So, here's a nice guide to what I've watched so far. If you see any overlaps in times, it's because I have digital cable and time-shifting. I love that.

King of the Hill (Sunday 7:30): We've only seen one episode of this show's new season, but it looks pretty standard. Nothing new here really. This show isn't as good as it used to be, but it also hasn't become bad. It's managed to find a nice level where it's still funny from time to time. Treading water after being on for so many years is an achievement in and of itself.

The Simpsons (Sunday 8:00): Die already. Please. Please, just die. Okay, so the show sucks, but it still has its moments. In fact, this season seems to be building on totally random, retarded shows like Aqua Teen Hunger Force with its plots. The shows are so fucking random and stupid, you find yourself laughing for no reason. I still think they need to hire a bunch of writers who don't watch the show, have them watch the first season and then proceed as if it were the second season. But no one listens.

The War at Home (Sunday 8:30): From the network that brought you Titus, we have Titus but with a nuclear family! This show follows a modern family that deals with cyber-sex, cross-dressing, homosexuality and all of those other "controversial" issues. It can be funny and it may grow into itself, but probably not. Still, it's sandwiched between The Simpsons and Family Guy, and there isn't much else on, so I'll keep watching.

Family Guy (Sunday 9:00): Remember how sad we all were when Family Guy was cancelled all those years ago? Remember how it had three quality seasons? Remember how bringing it back meant it gradually devolved into crap? Oh, sorry, I'm channelling the future with that last one. You'll recognise it in a couple of years.

American Dad (Sunday 9:30): Holy shit, this show has gotten good! It started out all shitty and everything, but it's growing into itself. Hell, it deserves the Emmy for best animated show just for the fish commentary in the season premiere.

Arrested Development (Monday 8:00): I didn't want this show to return for another season. I argued with a friend about it for a long time. I'm convinced that somewhere in this season, it will become total shit. It almost happened last season. That said, the first episode of the season fucking rocked. I really hope I'm wrong about this show.

Kitchen Confidential (Monday 8:30): And the award for the new show that tries too hard goes to . . .

House, MD (Tuesday 9:00): Fuck you, Emmy awards, this fucking deserved every award it was nominated for. A bit formulaic, but that is more than made up for with the characters. Every episode is a surprise of some sort. Fuck every other procedural show in every other drama, watch House.

Head Cases (Wednesday 9:00): Normally, I wouldn't go near a piece of shit show like this, but it's got Adam Goldman (or is it Goldberg? I can never remember . . .) and he fucking rocks. Chris O'Donnell plays a high powered asshole lawyer who has a nervous breakdown and has to rebuild his life, and does so by teaming with another lawyer who suffers from anger problems. Two episodes in and I still think O'Donnell's character is a fucking asshole who I want bad things to happen to. But, the second episode addition of Richard Kind to the cast has me thinking things may be looking up.

The Bernie Mac Show (Friday 8:00): How is this show not one of the most popular sitcoms in America? It's better than ninety percent of them easily, it's family oriented, and it's got the best black comedian head of a household since Bill Cosby. Added bonus with being able to watch cute kids turn into not-so-cute older kids. The kid who plays Jordan is hitting that awkward teenage boy stage where his voice is fucked and he's just weird. Tons of fun.

Killer Instinct (Friday 9:00): It was after The Bernie Mac Show and I had nothing better to do. We've got normal cops, we've got sexual crimes cops, we've got forensic teams, and now we've got deviant crimes cops. Full of clichés, lame plots and characters you don't give a shit about, Killer Instinct will either be the flop of the season or the breakout success. Hard to say. The only thing it has going for it is that it looks like lead cop man is being stalked by new partner woman.

How I Met Your Mother (Monday 8:30): A little over-the-top, but it has its moments. It's like a romantic comedy crammed into half an hour with all the excess shit cut out. Plus, Neil Patrick Harris is gold. Can anyone play an energetic asshole quite as well as him?

Still Standing (Wednesday 8:00): Typical family sitcom, but it gets a few good jokes in. The first episode of the season also had a nice moment where you just go "UH!" at the TV screen because it's so goddamn touching.

Yes, Dear (Wednesday 8:30): I, uh, thought they cancelled this years ago. I was wrong. Sadly. I watched the little bit before the theme song, went and used the bathroom, and then watched the final seven minutes. I wasn't lost at all. That's not good, people.

Corner Gas (Monday 8:00): The Canadian hit is back for a third season and it's still pretty damn good. The fact they only do thirteen episodes a season may account for that. The characters have almost become caricatures of themselves, but it still works. A nice take on small town wackiness.

And, that's it. You'll notice that a couple of networks didn't make the cut. There's a reason for that: they have nothing on that I want to watch. NBC can call me when Scrubs is back on and ABC can kiss my ass. Also, for those who can watch it, Curb Your Enthusiasm starts up again this week on HBO in the US and The Movie Network here in Canada. It got screwed at the Emmys as well.

So, hopefully, this little guide has helped you. Or not. If I had to pick three shows I've mentioned that you must watch, they'd be: House, Arrested Development and Curb Your Enthusiasm. Oh, and The Daily Show With Jon Stewart. Always watch The Daily Show.