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Shut Up And Listen 222

Fuck If I Know

I have no idea what to write my column about this week. I've got nothing. Nada. Zilch. Nil. Zero. The big O. This happens from time to time. Oh, only, what, twenty to thirty weeks out of the year?

Usually when this little problem comes up, I just throw something together and hope that the next week is better. Certain times are better than others, of course. Like last year, that was a sweet time to be writing a column. In the early summer there was the Canadian federal election, in the late summer there were the two conventions for the Democrats and the Republicans, and then in the fall was the US election. I got how many columns out of all of that? Maybe ten? That's a pretty decent amount right there. That's around 20% of the year taken care of by political events that happen either at random (Canadian elections) or every set number of years (US elections). Throw in the annual State of the Union Address by the president, plus all of those random issues that pop up, and there's maybe close to half of the columns. Then there are the odd random ideas that I get, like a column on internet dating or those two on my top twenty-five albums.

And then there are the filler columns. There was the one where I posted the first draft of a story I had written. Or there's the one I'm writing right now. The ones that I just pull right out of my ass usually around, oh, eight or nine at night on Saturday.

I don't know why exactly I do my column and updates on Saturday. It probably has to do with that being the day with the most free time and my near total lack of a social life. My usual routine for writing the column is to either write it as an event happens, or to save the idea and write it after supper on Saturday night, while listening to music or watching something. Right now, I'm watching the first disc of Newsradio seasons 1 and 2. Actually, I just finished watching the ten episodes on it and am now watching the little featurette on the show.

I honestly can't believe I've been doing this column this long. This is my two hundred and twenty-second column (well, two hundred and twenty-first because Troy Doney did one of my columns once) and that's insane. I do think it's been important for me to do this each and every week. Routine is a big thing with me and this gives me routine. It also forces me to sit down and write at least five hundred words. Sometimes it will take me twenty minutes and sometimes it will take me two hours (like tonight). But, as a writer, it's good to just force it sometimes, even if it's just for a stupid little internet column that maybe a dozen or two people read each week. I'd like to think that I've improved a little over the years.

I do know that I've gotten better at pissing people off--if I really want too, that is. I think the column that pissed people off the most was the one where I tried to reconcile my distaste for the Iraqi war with the fact that wishing the US to lose would mean US troops would have to die. Obviously, that pissed some people off, but that's how I felt and still feel. That's one thing I have learned: never apologise. I'll apologise for a lack of clarity on my part, but not for what I actually meant, even if I don't mean it anymore. That's something I've been very adamant over, because it would be a sort of betrayal to myself by apologising for what I once believed to be true. All I can say, if it is appropriate, is that I no longer feel that way.

And look at that, I've filled another column and there's a good chance next week's won't be much better, but here's hoping.