Shut Up And Listen 57

How To Build A Cabinet The Political Way
On Monday Ernie Eves became the newest Premier of Ontario officially and announced his cabinet. You know, it’ll take some getting used to, to call the Premier Ernie. Ernie’s a gay puppet’s name and we all know it.
	For the most part, the cabinet was nothing noteworthy or special. But there were some interesting highlights. 
	When Eves was campaigning for the job, he made a promise: every single one of his opponents would be in his cabinet. He kept that promise, even though I bet he’d have rather left Jim Flaherty out. He couldn’t do that though. This was the type of promise that if not kept, would come back to bite him in the ass. It was the kind of promise that if not kept, other politicians, other members of his party, would point out to the media. Normally, if a candidate makes a promise like “no new taxes” they don’t keep it because other politicians understand. They know it was just an election trick.
	But this promise involved other politicians.
	This promise had to be kept or Eves would face a legion of Flaherty supporters and the party would go into civil war. So he kept the promise, but still managed to bitch-slap Flaherty around, and for that, I will always have a soft spot for Eves.
	He made Flaherty Minister of Enterprise, Opportunity and Innovation aka the Superministry (no idea why it’s called that, so don’t ask). This was the ministry that Flaherty wanted to downsize once elected. This is science and technology. A demotion from Finance Minister. When I heard this, I laughed. Serves the fucker right. That’s what you get for taking on the big boys and getting beat, you Nazi fucker! Threaten to imprison the poor? Make derogatory statements against Natives? Say you want teenagers to get alcohol with greater ease? Eat it, shit-for-brains!
	Also, of note: Elizabeth Witmer was made Deputy Premier. If you remember, on Election Day, right after the first ballot, she took her name off the second one and threw in with Eves. Bet Tony Clement, who is still Health Minister, wishes he was a bit quicker. Could be his name right next to Big Boy’s. 

Fucking Americans!
I am pissed. 
	Pissed.
	Four. 
	Canadian.
	Soldiers.
	That’s how many were killed by an AMERICAN pilot.
	Four.
	We’re American’s allies. We’re their neighbour to the north. We’re family. Our countries are as close as two countries can get.
	And one of their pilots killed four of our soldiers.
	They were practicing with live weapons so they could better assist our American friends over in Afghanistan if things got ugly.
	And one of their pilots dropped a five hundred pound bomb on them.
	He requested to fire and was told not to. He took another pass and did so in “self-defence.” 
	And he dropped a bomb that killed four and wounded eight.
	The first Canadian combat deaths since the Korean War fifty years ago.
	It’s America’s “War On Terrorism.” Canada is helping out, as we are America’s ally. It’s friend.
	Four soldiers.
	Four doesn’t seem like a big number does it? Not compared to two thousand in New York and all the other deaths over in Afghanistan caused by more “friendly fire.”
	Osama bin Laden sent the plane that killed America’s people. George Bush sent the one that killed our people.
	America has the best military in the world . . .
	Six of the wounded were flown to Ramstein, Germany, and two had serious injuries.
	It was during the night. They were practising night exercises. 
	To better help our American allies.
	America is sorry and I believe it. 
	This will never happen again and I believe it.
	We will never forget this though.
	America wouldn’t if it were reversed.
	Four Canadian citizens killed by an American citizen who happened to be flying a US fighter jet equipped with a few five hundred pound bombs.
	Fuck.