Shut Up and Listen
Sunday May 13, 2001
Mother’s Day
That was today. I sent my mom, whom I live with, I’m only eighteen and still attending high school, an e-mail greeting card. I told her about my comic deal through this. She’s quite happy. Also made supper and did the dishes. Okay, the supper was hot dogs.

Monday May 14, 2001
Depression
I’m depressed and I don’t know why. Okay, I do know why, sort of.
Haven’t heard back from Ray yet and I’m a tad worried. If I don’t hear back in another week, I’ll send him another e-mail inquiring what the fuck is up.
Chicks. Do I need to say more?
A feeling of boredom that stems from nothing all that interesting going on. Except for the comic, but see #1.
Sean Twist’s columns have been rather depressing as of late and his depression is rubbing off onto me. But he has real problems, unlike mine. I’m just a kid and he’s got a mortgage and shit and that depresses me more. Something about how I always thought life would get better when I was older and it turns out, it doesn’t. Ah fuck.

Tuesday May 5, 2001
Chicks
Who doesn’t like ’em?
	Today on the bus, a girl I know, sat in front of me as she always does. I have my seat, she has hers. We’ve even helped protect one another’s territory from seat scroungers. So she sits down and tries to open the window. No luck, so I open mine to give the bus some air and I get a smile. Good, good. Then while travelling down a bumpy road, in the CITY, her window opens just a crack. I chuckled to myself at that. I though it was sort of funny. [Oh, and for clarification, I don’t want to be romantically involved with her. She has a boyfriend, plus she just ain’t my type.]
	In drama class, there’s a girl. Okay, there’s several, but this is my story, so shut it! For the past week, she has frightened me with The Look. Guys all over the world fear The Look. I’ve been getting it for no reason. Or really just anytime I open my mouth. This bothers me deeply. I’ve come up with three hypothesis: 	1) She likes me. (HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I know.)
		2) She hates me.
		3) She just finds it fun.
I think it’s option number three.

Wednesday May 16, 2001
Writing For Soaps
I must say that it’s a bit harder than writing for comics. You must make it racy without being too racy. I’ve also got to collaborate with nine or ten others in a way. Lunchbox is my writing partner, but guess who’s doing the actual writing? He likes it that way, I like it that way, so it’s not a big issue. According to Ms. Drama Teacher, writing in script form is my forté. Everyone else is just penning general scene descriptions. It’s like I’m the only full scriptwriter at a Marvel convention. I have written three scenes amounting to less than three pages of scripts. I must admit that fact shows that soaps don’t require nearly as much writing as comics or novels or regular screenplays or any other TV-type thing I’ve ever done. I am enjoying it. I seem to be the go-to guy with the ideas. Probably because I hate soaps, but understand them  and won’t take the stories too far because I get caught up in their allure. The others are trying to cram too much in and are focussing on their individual stories instead of seeing the Big Picture. Some characters can’t do certain things. I ranting again, I hope you’re enjoying it, ’cause I haven’t been doing nearly enough of it lately. More tomorrow.

Friday May 18, 2001
Long Weekend!
It’s the long weekend! Wah-hoo! Got a party at Tubby Bitch’s on Sunday. I’m the designated sober guy. Because he lives out in the boonies, I’m crashing at his house, so my mom doesn’t have to come get me at one in the morning. I love long weekends. And I’m aware that it isn’t tomorrow. Sorry, had nothing to write.

Writing For Soaps II
I’ve got to plan out the entire project now. I’ve been given everyone’s notes and it’s my job to plan out each scene. I’ve got no problem doing this. I’m going to enjoy it I imagine. It’s just, to quote Tweek: “Too much pressure! Gah!” This is a lot of pressure to write some good stuff. This is the big leagues, folks: drama class! “Tonight I feel like the luckiest man in baseball.”

Canada VS USA
Canada will fight the US over drilling in Alaska! Yeah! That’s right, boy! Huh!
	They’re also willing to sell the US some of our crude oil instead.
	Who didn’t see that one coming?

Gandhi
We’ve been learning about Mohandas K. Gandhi in religion for the past week. Watched the movie; took notes; had discussions on his policies; fun, fun, fun!
	I like Gandhi and admire at what he was able to accomplish. I agree with most of what he said and disagree with a few points (celibacy? Fuck that! Okay, I’ve been living that policy, but not by choice).
	I agree wholeheartedly with his views on non-violent resistance. Violence breeds more violence. You hit me, I hit you back. That shit don’t fly, boys. I’m one of the only people in my class that seems to agree with that policy.	
	I believe in fighting injustices. I wonder how the school would react if I protested uniforms through a fast?
	The only one that I believe Gandhi was hinting at, but never came right out and said was: be good to people. That’s my policy.

“An eye for an eye only makes the whole world blind.” Gandhi
	
Cruisin’
Today Lunchbox had the car and we went a cruisin’. First he got me and Little Man Rump out of first and we went to the mall. He needed some cash so he bought the new Daft Punk CD. He ate some Mickey D’s and then we drove around for twenty minutes listening to the aforementioned CD, which kicks ass. I’m getting it next month for free from a promotional thing in high schools.
	At lunch, we went back to Mickey D’s and then went back to the parking lot and listened to more Daft Punk. We laughed our asses off at track four. Go pick up Discovery, it’s good. And, if you’re ever driving down Oxford St., turn on One More Time full blast with the bass all the way up and the treble all the way down.  

Saturday May 19, 2001
Natural Born Writer
Just watched Natural Born Killers after taping it last night. I’ve seen the movie once already and didn’t like it this time either. Some of the base concepts and observations are good. The cruel world and media shit and all, but a lot of it is just fucked up shit. If I was stoned it might look cool, but I’m not, so it wasn’t that cool.
	It did get me thinking about writing one super hero story that I’ve been kicking around for a while. It’s just one of those “anti-heroes” getting interviewed on TV about his life. He answers the questions about killing and such. 
	“You know, the way I see it, if you infringe on another person’s civil rights, you lose yours. I find it funny that one minute an old lady will have a gun in front of her, held by some shitbag who’s demanding her purse and wedding ring that her late husband gave her; and then the next, she’s yelling at me to let the poor guy go. One time I actually turned to this one guy and said, ‘Fine, I’ll let him go, mister. I’ll put things right back to the way they were and let him steal that teddy bear you were about to give your little girl for her birthday. You want that? Or would you like to go home to your daughter knowing that this piece of shit won’t bother you or any other innocent person again?’ The guy look at me with a real blank look, turned and walked away. See, you just have to make people understand that you’re doing it for their own good. Who gives a rat’s ass about some scumbag who will kill you, rape your mom, wife and daughters and corrupt your son? I say fuck ’em. 
	“Why is it that the other super guys can go out and kill aliens who just happen to venture a little too close to our planet, whether or not they’re peaceful is inconsequential, and I get busted for capping that guy who just stole your TV? It’s shit like that that makes me wonder why I should even bother. Why should I? 
	“People need to face the fact that some people are shit and need to be exterminated for the good of society. What do these criminals add to our world except for pain and suffering? Me eliminating them makes the world a better place. And, after they’re gone, I’m killing myself because I’m scum, too. I kill people and cause pain and suffering. 
	“The only difference is that I do it to those who do it to you. 
	“Next question:”
Okay, so maybe I don’t need to actually write the story as that few paragraphs encompass all that I wanted to say on the matter. Although I think I will use something similar sometime in Incandescent just because if I think of shit like this, Scott would, too. (For those who do not know, Scott is my comic self in the pages of Incandescent, my dream book. I know a comic me sounds pretty lame, but it’s not. Trust me, it shows every stage of super hero development from the golden age right up to now. Someday, when I’m ready, I’ll try writing it again.)