"Blah Blah Blah Blah, I'm a fucking moron" - Declan Swan.

Let me tell you a thing or two about my Sister. She's loud, irritating, smelly and cruel. That lot would be just about bearable, but I fucking hate her. Blood relations mean nothing, I couldn't give a damn if I never saw her again. Why? Because she is one of the most selfish people I have ever known, and selfishness is a trait I abhor over all others.

Ten days ago, it was my mum's birthday (happy birthday mum, you don't look a day over 30... maybe). What wonderful present did my sister get that would cheer my mum up so much? Any guesses? That's right, a SUICIDE ATTEMPT! My god, how did she KNOW that's exactly what my mum needs.

"Thanks Wendy, I've always wanted to stay up in hospital all night worrying if my youngest daughter is going to make it through the night! Thanks!"

I have nothing but contempt for anyone who commits suicide. They are throwing away the greatest gift that could possibly have been given. I don't care if their life is shit, or their dog just died, or their parents won't let them see each other. There is ALWAYS a back door which doesn't involve killing yourself. Suicide is the easy way out. It's the path trodden by morons who CANNOT BE BOTHERED to pull themselves out of the shitstorm they live in and make their way to the goal they set in the very beginning. ( good analogy is that of using a level skip cheat in a computer game to skip stright to the end without playing it all through. Only in this case, you'd be disappointed to find that you may well be taken further back than when you started).

Anyway, back to the gargoyle. Some of you may be thinking right now "Oh, he's just upset because of the shock" or some other such bullshit. Well think again. This is not the first time she's tried it. So why did she do it? Was she really so fed up with her life that she wanted to end it there and then? Was it a desperate cry for help? No. It was none of these things. The reason she did it is because she can't fucking stand to see other people getting more attention lavished on them. She had said to Vicki, my girlfriend: "I knew I wasn't going to die." 

Attention seeking is perhaps a device employed by 80% of the population at some point in their lives. Most grow out of it. Some become actors. Others become detestable. But it's quite normal, I suppose. But wait, because her selfishness doesn't stop there.

There was a knock at the door of my parent's house at 3:00 AM Monday morning. It was the police. They had found my sisters car trashed in a ditch near the village we used to live at years ago. When I first heard the news, I felt satisfied, knowing that - to some extent at least - balance had been restored by my sister having her car stolen and generally fucked beyond repair. But then the truth came out and I got really fucking angry. Now I don't get angry very often. Very few people have seen me very angry, and on this occasion I managed to keep it under control. What was the truth that made me so angry? My sister had been driving the car at the time, Drunk.

She had gone into town, got well and truly fucking blasted, tried to drive home, but rolled the car on the way. Uninjured, she staggered out and walked home... to the house we lived in 2 years ago. I don't know what happened after that, but she must have somehow got a taxi back to my parent's house (which is on the other side of town), written a false note saying she'd left er car in town, and crawled into bed.

Drink driving is a disgusting crime to perpetrate. I couldn't give a shit about drunk drivers tat die after driving their car off a bridge, they deserve worse than that anyway. The thing that really makes me sick is the fact that 80% of the time, the drunk driver survives, but the 10 year old girl he just mowed down doesn't even have a chance to say goodbye to her parents, who are now in comas in the ITU of the local hospital. Yet another selfish crime which carries a laughably insevere penalty. But the topic of crime and punishment is one for another day.

Now, my sister claims that it wasn't her fault that she tried to kill herself on my mother's birthday, it wasn't her fault that she got bladdered and recklessly drove the to the wrong house, it wasn't her fault, it WASN'T HER FUCKING FAULT. No, no, the doctors say that she has a hormonal imbalance etc etc.

Well fuck you, because I'm sick of hearing this shit off everyone.

"It wasn't johnny's fault he bludgeoned a 3 year olfd to death, he saw some bad movies"

"It wasn't Billy's fault he punched his 15 year old daughter in the face, she was misbehaving"

"It wasn't Julies fault she got fucked on heroin, the dealer said it would be OK."

Fuck all of you, because you know damn well it's all fucking bullshit. In todays society, everyone is looking for someone else to blame. Every day I see adverts stating "No win, no fee - claim money for personal injury" Why? WHY? BECAUSE NOBODY CAN EVER ACCEPT FUCKING RESPONSIBILITY.

It was Johnny's fault he bludgeoned a 3 year old kid to death. So what if he had seen some bad movies, it was him holding the fucking wrench, not the director. It was Billy's fault that he punched his 15 year old daughter in the face, it was his arm and his fist, she did't fucking run into it. It was julies fault that she got fucked on heroin, she could easily have told the dealer to fuck off.

Everything you ever do is your own responsibility. it is nobody else's fault. Nobody. For once in your life, accept the fucking responsibility and take the fucking blame, don't fish around for pathetic excuses that make things seem better. You cannot blame anybody's actions on movies, computer games, books, rap music, heavy metal, etc. The only person that you can blame for any action is the person that took that action. The sooner we all realise this, the quicker we can get on with fulfilling our goals.